Worshiping the Nights

After the hurricane struck,
I hopped on the volunteer train,
surrounding myself with ceaseless chatter.
Eight hours of travel felt like a lifetime,
yet the frantic babbling never died.
There was an explosion of silence upon arrival
for nothing was left of this city,
except canals of grief;
Katrina stripped the identity
of a metropolis built with love.
My stomach ate my heart as the truth set in;
people once lived here.
The only noise we heard was our own breath,
lungs expanding like balloons
only to be constricted by
the anaconda of labor.
Were we doing any good?
We were ants rebuilding our colony
one grain of dirt at a time.
White flags tempted me,
but my resilient nature rejected surrender.
Thus, I continued laboring,
worshiping nights
that saved me from reality.

Mother of Mine

Panic acts like a pesky alarm
clock, waking you from your slumber.
Do you know where you are?
A loud burst of thunder
sparks confusion; sanity slips through
your fingers and breaks asunder.
"Who are you? Who are you?"
Tears pull your heavy, tired eyes, and
I am frozen; shock will not let me move.
How have you forgotten who I am?
Dad is lost in the rapids of his grief,
leaving me alone with you. Damn
the muck that infects you, that eats
the container of your soul.
Our eyes make contact; please
remember, let your memories enfold
you and release you from
this paroxysm's control.
Through your eyes, I enter the junkyard
of your mind. "I am your daughter."
Hope leaks from the vessels of my heart--

then turns to water and evaporates.

Love This Post!

So, I was writing a reflection on a Cultural Enrichment that I attended last week and while taking a mental break, I found these pictures on my computer that my 9 year old sister took (using my computer's camera, of course) during our trek to South Carolina.







These literally made my day. And there are about 15 more.

Random Thoughts...In Result of New Testament

Once again I have successfully wasted time.
BUT for a good purpose.
Recently, I have been devoting my time to reflecting, reflecting, and more reflecting. I tend to do it the most right after my New Testament class just because it puts me in a trance. Like I pay attention and I participate; however, when I leave the class, real life still hasn't hit me. My inference: New Testament just affects me spiritually.
Something about this class alters my perspective of reality; I guess you could say it opens my mind. To be honest, I really don't know what to say or how to explain it.
One thing I do know, though, is that I'm definitely gaining some insight as to what I believe.
My faith used to, and still does, lie within my family, both extended and immediate. I really feel God's presence when I am with them. It is not that I don't feel God otherwise; it's just when I am around them that I know for sure God is there. I will admit, I don't feel comfortable talking about my faith outside of church, family, and other specific circumstances, because religion is quite a controversial subject. Plus, what I believe is a mixture of things...I wish I could explain or affirm what my true beliefs are, but there aren't really words to describe them. Like I said before, what I think or consider regarding faith/religion is a compilation of multiple ways of life or ideas. Maybe one day I will be able to express it logically.

That is the point of this post. Sorry to disappoint.

New Art

Newest work...there are a lot of problems with it, but the original photo was on my computer and not on a piece of paper next to me.

Living, Breathing, Finding the Heart of the Matter

So as I was listening to my iPod on shuffle, this song popped up (I forgot it even existed). Since that period of time, I've kept it on repeat and decided to live my life based off of it. Here's the song and the lyrics posted below.

http://www.lala.com/#artist/India.Arie (click on The Heart of the Matter)

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And all the struggles we went through
How I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I've been learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning them again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work they put between us,
You know it doesn't keep us warm

I've been trying to live without you now
But I miss you, baby
The more I know, the less I understand
And all the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my heart is so shattered
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

All the people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down, you know they hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; cause life goes on
You keep carryin' that anger, it'll eat you up inside

I wanna be happily everafter
And my heart is so shattered
But I know it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
Because the flesh gets weak
And the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if you don't love me anymore
Even if you don't love me anymore

HAAAAAAA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNlAw1WingU

YOU HAVE TO WATCH THAT VIDEO ASAP.